One of most intelligent and kindest people I have been lucky to meet in person is Prof Gordon Dutton. He has worked for over 20 years at the Royal Hospital for Sick Children in Glasgow and is also Emeritus Professor of Visual Science at Glasgow Caledonian University. His true passion for the work he does is in one word is mesmerizing. When I asked him what recently improved his wellbeing it become clear how we can all benefit from the wisdom of the young and the purity of the old. This is his answer:
"I met with my 3 month old beautiful grandson this morning. I spoke with him while gradually slowing all elements of my voice. At the sweet spot of the optimum speed, his focussed gaze was enriched by a beaming smile lasting for some time, giving me a deep sense of engagement and love." To find out more in how Gordon sees the world go to his Profile
Though a lot of people don’t care, many people are very excited at the prospect of sport returning. Football especially. It’s long been known that we get a sense of belonging by identifying with clubs and recently many ‘fan’s forums’ have busied themselves with retrospective ‘favourite memories” themes. Recent articles in papers have picked up on the fact that they all seem to involve people not sport. Partying after a win, getting lost on the way to the ground. In nearly all the ‘favourite memory’ stories the actual result / events on the pitch seem largely incidental! Even more positively, in rugby, there has long been emphasis on the world wide ‘rugby family’ generally so it’s : ”whoever you support and wherever you’re from If you like rugby I’m very probably going to like you”. It contributes to the fact that crowds don’t need to be segregated and intermingling at matches is natural (indeed expected) and often joyous. Recently, the shared Covid experience has reminded us that, the world over, we’re all in this together. A conscious aim of RBME is to promote these positive mind-sets.
In her multi-million selling book Carol Dweck stresses that the difference between success and failure in life is largely determined by mind-set. She stresses that people with a learning mind-set see almost everything as a learning opportunity. They know that mistakes are inevitable, especially if you strive for success, and it’s what you learn from the inevitable setbacks that makes all the difference. Defensive people, on the other hand, often swerve difficult tasks and challenges in case they fail, as for anyone with a fragile ego, ‘failure’ is be avoided at all costs. For example, younger siblings are massively over-represented at the elite sport level. It turns out that many compared themselves to an older sibling and strove to catch them up (the Murray brothers in Tennis is just one of countless examples). However, many younger siblings with a negative mind-set just pick an unrelated sport or walk away from it entirely. We need to accept that we are who we are and that: ‘always there will be greater and lesser’ others. The trick is to not just wish, but to accept reality and do.
Comparing ourselves with others is inevitable but there are 2 golden rules:
Ask yourself, on a 1 to 10 scale, to what extent you apply these golden rules. Then seek to halve the gap to 10. If you scored 4 try and get to 7. An impressive 8? Then try and get to 9.